This morning I did my usual volunteering at the SPCA. I cleaned the hospital wing again; I think it's my favourite part to do because there is more room in there to move around while you clean out the cages (unlike the other areas where you basically need to be a contortionist to do anthing). I also like that it's away from everyone else — I like to do my job in peace, I guess.

Next week is my last week volunteering there because my life is becoming complicated and I don't feel I can make the commitment to it anymore.

There was a gorgeous little ginger kitten there today. He had a handsome face with hazel eyes; they matched his fur. He hissed alot though, at just about everything. Stroppy but cute!

You always end up falling in love with some of them. They're all cute but sometimes there's an animal there that you seem to connect with and are drawn to. It might not be the cutest one there, or the most friendly, but something about them captures your heart and you wish you could give them a home.

I have been very good. I have not come home with any new additions to our menagerie, but there have been times where I would have loved to have brought one home.
I remember at the end of last year, before going away for Christmas, crying over four little fluffy, black kittens because I liked them so much. I was so sad that I couldn't give at last one a nice home. It's too hard with having two dogs who think cats are on the menu and trying to juggle them with the cat I already have. Plus we travel to Auckland so much and I already take my cat with me so having another one would just make things far too complicated than I'm willing to let them get at this point.

There is a rabbit at the SPCA that, if it's not claimed by it's owners, will be coming home with me. Our rabbit passed away a year ago and my mum really misses having one, so we've been on the waiting list for any bunnies that come in.
He's very cute, fairly big in size, a bit fluffy and he's got floppy ears. I think he looks like a Billy.

I don't tend to name animals after cartoons or food (or verbs for that matter). They get dignified "human names" when I name them. Although, once I did name a bird after my favourite Backstreet Boy's nickname...I was eleven, so... Yeah.

On a more personal note, there is some family business that needs sorting. It's not really business in a negative sense, it's just that it involves a possible move back to Auckland and so forth. I feel a bit up-in-the-air because I don't know what's happening and I dislike situations like that. I would rather know exactly what's going on so I can get my head around it and figure out what I'm going to do.

I don't have anything tying me here in Gisborne. I have some friends but I don't feel like I have made any who I have connected really well with. I have always been guarded and I find it hard to let people in, even if I really want to. I am the only one to blame for not having made friendships here I feel like I can fall back on. Ones that are everlasting and so strong I will dread leaving. I love the people I do have here, but I feel like it's only gone so far and we don't have that extra element to make our relationships stronger.
I'm used to being the outcast and it doesn't bother me for the most part, but it would be nice to find some people who I really connect with and who "get me", or at least have more in common with me. I guess we all just want to fit in somewhere and I have yet to find my "somewhere".

I am thankful I don't have a someone tying me here, but on the flipside I sort of wish I did. It's an odd feeling. As I mentioned previously, I do like someone here, but the opportunity to do something about it has not arisen and I get the impression he is perhaps not interested in me.

I really ought to go to bed earlier.